i'm so bored right now i might just start a puddle-jumping fad...

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You know I carefully chose these words to write?
I spent many minutes trying to think of the words you will never see.
Here it is sweet boy.



You know, I stayed awake last night.
But of course you don't know that.
You aren't here with me at this moment.
And at this moment,
I realized you shouldn't be.
Wait though, believe me baby,
when I say there is NOTHING more I want than that.
It is just that, you need to find someone
who's heart is full and able to love.
Who knows who they are.
I'm not done discovering myself,
and until then, I don't want anyone else to start on me.
You've been magical to me.
Your love is unconditional.
And for that, you shall always have my love in your heart.
Many hours and days and years from now,
you probably won't know me anymore.
But remember I am still yours.
No matter where I go.
You are my home.

Dear Cruel World

Your one cruel cruel teacher, you prowl and hunt on the young who know nothing about life. You like to burn people and destory all of there soul. You kill the child in a person, murder the hope, eliminate the trust in humanity, you shun, disgrace, digust the hearts of so many people, its no wonder why no one cares about anyone else but themselves. You turn people into monsters! I am falling victim of your hostile games and I am fighting with myself right now trying to figure out if I should just cave in and become weak....or keep fighting to be strong. I have a choice. Be weak and conform into another lifeless zombie like the rest of the world is, desensitized to the nightmares, accepting of tryants, hopeful of a day dream that will never be a reality or I could be an outspoken angel, tearing through what society wants, express my soul but be rejected, feared and cursed for burning others. Those are my only options. One is easier then the other.

I do not want to be a zombie...but its a easy road to have life force fed to me, not being allowed to decide what is up or down, I get a life that is not my own. A life where I just listen to a higher being and do whatever the fuck they tell me. I want to be a angel, a rarity to the world, someone who changes everything that already is, but that road is so hard. Everyone yelling at you telling you your wrong, life is a card game for you, if your hand is good then life is made, but if your stuck without a good hand then life is the shit. I am fighting the system as much as I can. I care about humanity, I see life in shades of color.

Fuck all you zombies, who stopped caring about humanity, who see the world in black and white, who cannot do what your heart cries out for, fuck all of you who are selfish, only think about yourself, fuck all of you who cannot see the beauty in everything, who are ungrateful for what you have and cannot just be happy. There is so much to life that you have yet to learn but if you cannot have it now its not worth living. You cannot suffer, you have to be free of negativity and scorn, only happiness, and if you cant be happy all the time your life is horrible.

Let me tell you what you zombies dont realize, if you cannot be happy in suffering, then you cannot be happy when times are good. That happiness will have no meaning.

Right now my life sucks, I have no job, I am in serious debt, my mother thinks I am a fuck up, my father abandoned me when I was 11, I have no REAL friends, I have a boyfriend who is walking down the road of becoming a zombie, I am married to a douche bag who wont give me the damn divorce I have wanted since fucking July, I have no car, no phone, no communication with the world, no support, nothing, I am alone in this world. Yes, my life isnt what I want it right now, but am I depressed? No! I am happy with what I do have, because I know what I do have cannot be taken away from me, everything else can, but I will find something in my nothing to be happy about. I know one day when I have everything I ever wanted I will be truely happy, and my happiness will have meaning, because I know what suffering is, I been there, done that and know balane.

You cannot understand anything without balance. You have to suffer to know what happiness is. I have cried enough tears for this world that when I welcome smiles they will be real ones.

My message to all the zombies out there....stop lying to yourself and be real, admit your wrongs, admit the faults in your life and find something to truely be happy for, because your only given one life and you should be what makes it. Just be real.

~ Jeka

Birthday Girl,
Waking up to your sweet face this morning, your nude body pressed gently against mine, your warm hands running down my spine, your lips pushing against mine as I opened my eyes to see you pulling back, smiling at me with that look you give that sends me to heaven made it feel as if I were waking to my birthday, not yours. I hope this day brings your joy, as I hope every other day will, but your twentieth birthday deserves to be such a special day for you. You have brought so much happiness and peace into my life, my love, and you have helped me become so humble and true. I wish only that I can return to you what you have given me. I try, I try so hard, please let me know when I succeed.

You tell me that you love me, want to spend the rest of your life with me, could not live without me, and I believe it all. I want to hear it all. What I want to hear more than anything, though, has never been said. I do not know if it is felt, and it scares me. Maybe, though, it is not meant to be said; only felt. 

I do not want to lose you. I do not want to love and lose again, especially someone like you. The love that I hold for you is earth shattering, mind blowing, unbelievable. It makes all the other loves that I have ever had for anyone else feel void. They all disappear. You erase my mind of all bad that's happened in my life,my troubles, my fears. You leave me tingling with happiness and pulsating with love. Please, let me know that I do the same to you. I would hate to be just another love to you, I want to be the one. The one love that you will never let go. 

Happy birthday.

Hi! I'm Amélie, 23 from France!
I've just joined the community cos I'm looking for friends from Brazil or Spain! I've studied English, Spanish and Portuguese at college and now that I'm off, I'd love to improve my language skills!

A little more about me : I'm currently living in Marseilles, in the South of France with my boyfriend. I'm about to enter a volunteering service and to work with kids and teens :)
I'm interested in arts, music (see profile for getting an idea of what I like!), icons making and languages. I'd love to speak spanish and portuguese properly, oh and Italian as well ^^

Random facts : I'm scared of fish, I'm addicted to fashion, Ikea and H&M are my friends, I'd love to travel all around the world (esp. Australia, Japan, Mexico, Brazil, Spain, Canada) and I'm most of the time super-bubbly!

If you'd like to know me, comment in this entrie! My eljay is friends-only so I'll add you there, after seeing your comment (if we have interests in common!!)

perfect music for fall. sort of sleepy, grey indoors music. also sort of reminds me of Brahms with all that brass. I like the artwork they layered one after another to the music. Yeah the movie was tragic and painful. But the music was the one window out of that tragedy. escapist. the artwork sort of could symbolize what might happen to someone as they start to lose their vision, like the main character of the movie. ...seeing splotches, maybe. interesting to think that there can be beauty and creativity even in the degeneration of our senses. like Beethoven going deaf. there's still a whole world of stuff happening.

My bb Zooey attended the 4th Annual Behind the Camera Awards ceremony last night... here are some photos of her, as well as a couple with Joseph Gordon-Levitt (and some other guy... I tried to find out who he was but have no clue, lol sorry).

( thought of you as everything i had but couldn't keep )

Source 1 and Source 2

The television series "Ally McBeal" was on air from 1997 until 2002, focusing on the romantic and personal lives of the eccentric lawyers at the fictional, Boston firm of "Cage, Fish & Associates." Calista Flockhart played the title character, a 28-year-old Harvard Law School grad working at her ex-boyfriend's firm. In the five years it was on the air, the Emmy-winning program introduced its audience to dancing babies, unisex bathrooms and the word "wattle." For the first time, the entire series is out on DVD, and executive producer David E. Kelley and eight former cast members joined "Good Morning America" for a reunion.

( I've been searching my soul tonight, I know there so much more to life, Now I know I can shine the light, to find my way back home... )

>>
here @ my journal.

Kristin was spotted at LAX last week sitting... Because that's what beautiful people do, they sit... and or, those who are just waiting to be boarded on their flight... either way.

( More sitting under the cut! )

Source

Here's an excerpt from a column that actress Romola Garai ("Atonement") wrote for The Observer in which she mentions she's auditioning for "Spider-Man 4."

"Love is at the root of everything good that has ever happened and will happen." This phrase swam into focus as I moved up the escalator at Oxford Circus tube on Tuesday morning on my way to put myself "on tape" for a part in Spider-Man 4. This is the acting equivalent of the London Marathon in that it's important to try your best as long as you understand that you aren't going to win.

Source

It was posted earlier that Rachel McAdams was a frontrunner for a role in the movie, which could possibly be Felicia Hardy/The Black Cat. The only thing I've ever seen Garai in was "Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights," but I think she could be a better fit. I'm not sure if McAdams could play the same age as Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst, who both look eternally 12. So ONTD, have any other casting possibilities for The Black Cat? Oh yeah, and I don't think it was ever posted here, but Dylan Baker confirmed he would be back as Dr. Curt Conners in the fourth movie. That doesn't necessarily mean The Lizard is the main villain, but it's still a possibility.

During her interview with Diane Sawyer, Rihanna revealed that she finally walked away from her relationship with Chris Brown after briefly reuniting because she wanted to set a positive example for her fans. The singer said she didn't want young girls to think it was OK to return to an abusive situation.

But Rihanna also said she doesn't want to be the "domestic-violence spokesperson," because Brown's assault is only one aspect of her story.

"One of the big things for me, I always want to help young women and give them insight into life experiences," she told MTV News on Monday. "One of those things is going through an abusive relationship like I did. But that's one thing for me. So I don't want to be the big domestic-violence spokesperson, because that doesn't define who I am. But if I can help young women in any way, and that being one of the things they need help with, then I'll do that."

Rihanna is attempting to move forward following the February assault, when Brown left her battered and bruised in his rented Lamborghini after a pre-Grammy party. He eventually struck a plea deal and was sentenced to 180 days of community labor, weekly therapy sessions and five years' probation.

Brown has already conducted a handful of interviews, including MTV News' "Chris Brown: The Interview" on Friday. But Rihanna didn't break her silence until last week's sit-down with Sawyer.

"It was the biggest weight lifted off my chest," she told MTV News. "If you watch the interview, you see it was a subject that I didn't talk about for the eight months that I didn't talk about it, so that was my first real time opening up. I had a lot of tension bottled up. So when I finally spoke about it, it felt really good. More importantly, it felt good that people got something positive out of it, because it's devastating. It's not fun to talk about or listen to, but there are a lot of women who are going through it, a lot of teenagers who are scared to talk about it. So I thought it was a good thing that I can be that voice for them and help them get out of that situation."



mtv

Dollhouse actress Eliza Dushku attends the Breeders' Cup Winners Circle Event in LA.



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Outtakes from Eliza's photo shoot with Venice magazine.



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A Simple Plotting Technique

Here's a simple plotting technique you can use to organize your novel!

lie to me if you will
at the top of beringer hill
tell me anything you want, any ole lie will do
call me back to, back to you

Kansas City Chiefs running back Larry Johnson was suspended last month after criticizing team officials and posting two homosexual slurs online.


KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Larry Johnson's record-breaking career as a Kansas City running back is over.

The Chiefs confirmed Monday that they had run out of patience with his off-the-field problems and released Johnson the day he was due to come back from his second suspension in a year.

Johnson, who turns 30 on Nov. 19, was just 75 yards away from breaking Priest Holmes' team rushing record.

The decision by the Chiefs (1-7) was not a surprise.

"A part of him is excited and a part of him is very regretful," Johnson's agent, Peter Schaffer, told The Associated Press. "There's a lot of feelings going on right now. It's analogous to breaking up with a girlfriend. Maybe you saw it coming, but it still hurts when it happens."

A No. 1 draft choice out of Penn State in 2003, Johnson was one of the best running backs in the NFL in 2005 and 2006, rushing for more than 1,700 yards in each of those Pro Bowl seasons.

But often angry and sullen, he was dogged by controversy and frequently at odds with coaches and fans. On Oct. 25, in what turned out to be his final episode with the Chiefs, he posted on his Twitter account several insults to fans, questioned coach Todd Haley's credentials and used a gay slur.

He repeated the slur the next day to reporters and was suspended for two weeks. At Schaffer's urging, the Chiefs cut the financial penalty in half, saving him about $315,000.

( Read more... )

So in my earlier post I failed to mention the Tegan and Sara article in my Alternative Press. Here are some high lights with the full scan behind the cut ! :

* "Hell" is one of three songs co-written with AFI bassist Hunter Burgan. (Here's their recent performance of that song on Conan O'Brien)
* "Sainthood" draws its title from the Leonard Cohen song "Came So Far For Beauty"
* "Sainthood" was produced by Death Cab For Cutie's Chris Walla (who produced "The Con")
* AltPress gives the album 4.5 out of 5 stars
* Tegan is excited to play "Northshore" live.

( Scan............... )

P.S. If you asked for Sunny Day Real Estate, check your mensajes..

Frontman MAX BEMIS walks us through every track on SAY ANYTHING's self-titled album.


Fed To Death
"Ironically, this is the first song I wrote for the record, and it also became the first song on the record. It's pretty much a statement of purpose about what I think is wrong with the world or what is worth fighting against in the world. It covers two aspects: one is someone who is irresponsible and the other is one who claims too much responsibility and is obsessed with power. Both of which I think are two things wrong with society--people who do those things."

( More genius and explanation this way )

SOURCE

"Bad Romance" Video Premiere

Posted by TheAdmin on 11/9/2009 | Comments (81)

Calling all little monsters: the “Bad Romance” video will premiere Tuesday morning pacific time on LadyGaga.com!


It's also on her Facebook.


Source

And no, I don't know what time specifically because I haven't been able to find a source mentioning a time.

Streaming is Fall Out Boy's "From Now On We Are Enemies." The song is a new b-side that is being released on their upcoming greatest hits album, which can be pre-ordered here.

Click the Source so listen because I can't embed.

SOURCE